Part DEUX

 continued....


When I reached Milwaukee, I was lost. I knew that The Rave/Eagles Club was a large, often trafficked concert hall, but the lack of dancers, and well known DJs visiting said establishments was close to nil. There was also no places for me to dance. I felt very lost. I began slowly meeting people by a tending the few and far between concerts that i could, going to clubs, herring local top 40s djs and slowly I began to find my people again. These people brought me into the party scene of the city, the behind closed doors, the up and coming music I had never really been privy to. The struggling artists who held down more than one job to support their love of the scene. Those people I began to cling to because they wanted so badly to contribute to the very scene I had been riding along for a living. I was hooked. I began to dance for raves. Small, events thrown by a few djs, a fledgling production company, illegal in some cases, and more fun than anything I had ever known. I was giving back more to the music that had given so much to me. I began organizing, helping to throw, doing the business end of everything in order to have my hand in this. I continue, to this day, and have well established myself as a dancer, designer of rave clothing and a friend to the most talented musicians in the industry. You see, the fact is, the big names ride pom the waves of their success, these people get no recognition, no real pay. I now can truly say I am watching stars rise. I am helping those who want so badly to just play a show so someone hears their talent. This is the sort of witness I am. I am giving whatever I can to now allow for someone else to experience that rush. To let someone pretend that for and evening they are Tiesto, even if they play only to their own friends in a dingy bar in a dingy town.
Because of my desire to bring this experience to others, I not only began making rave wear, I now own a small business doing it. I also have begun to run my own GoGo dancing company. I want to find the next best girl for the job. It is so important for me to be present. I don't need to record, write down, photograph or document these events. I have found that this world is about each personal momentary experience. There is no way to capture emotion in a bottle. Music is what feelings sound like. and every night we continue to pack our selves into these places because we are chancing that high. I will dance until my knees crumble, and then I will design until the style is old and I can proudly say that I knew Von Foil, Marcus J, Decode, Swamppkatt and other names that you will never see on a bill for The Congress Theatre. But I was there, and that is more than enough. I can only hope to bring more people in, but you can't take anything away from it but the images that play inside your head.
Witness, for EDM, is a split second. And then the memories remain. You can't explain your heart syncing up to a bass beat, sweat forming on your skin as they build up before the drop. You can't explain how you can hug a total stranger, hold them and sing along to "Raise Your Weapon" and leave a concert hall with a new best friend and not know their real name. Or maybe it's the time that you walked up to Theo from Designer Drugs (a NY dj duo) and told him, not asked, that you were going to hang out with them after the show. I did, we still call each other. I have his number in my phone, he's studying to be a doctor. Von Foil works for MPS, he is a child psychologist, he parties harder than anyone I have ever met, 7 nights a week. He is one of the most beloved and prolific djs I have ever met. And all he asks for a night to play is $200 dollars. These feeling and emotions are so precious to me. That is what bearing witness is, it is being present. It is being there. It is sharing a moment with a room full of people all dancing to the same tune, or talking to a world famous dj about his dreams of being a surgeon, and then making sure he calls to let you know he landed safe in Japan. It's the one day you spend finding the individuality in the desire to come together. For that I am proud.