Speaking of nerdy crap

Tomorrow there will be a 72 hour video game marathon done by the Speed Gamers. They will play all three Mother games and will be joined by my mortal youtube enemy, chuggaaconroy. They're doing it for charity on their ustream channel.


I'll be there but I'll miss the beginning because of the upcoming Rifftrax Live Show. But I will be there. I'll defintely chip in a couple bucks for the charity, in this case a charity for breast cancer.

Anyway, since I'm running a gag into the ground, here's another cosplay picture.




She's a boyish princess from the third Mother game. She had a sharp tongue and mostly used magic.

Good Cheap Places to Eat in NYC, Part 2

Last night my teeny tiny Asian husband and I went to the Cosmic Diner on 8th Avenue and 52nd Street. I will admit that I like diner food a lot, so I'm probably biased, but there are a lot of diners around here -- so many, in fact, that I got overwhelmed and just have never bothered to actually pick one.

We chose to go to the Cosmic Diner last night because, according to Bill Corbett of Rifftrax, he and other Brains ate there at least once and their autographed picture was up on the wall. (Bill said this on the Rifftrax blog. I know he did, don't ask me to prove it.) We didn't see any autographed pictures of any Brains at all (just some dumb Broadway people), but the food there was great. We both ordered burgers -- Onil ordered the Texas burger, which came on a regular hamburger roll but topped with cheese and a fried egg, and I ordered the pizzy burger, which came on an English muffin and topped with mozzarella and marinara sauce. All in all pretty straight-forward burgers (mine especially), but they were really delicious. The meat was flavorful and the sauce on mine tasted great. We also ordered onion rings, fries and sodas, and the entire bill came to $27.25.

If you're in the culinary wasteland that is Times Square, walk a few blocks out of your way to the Cosmic Diner for an excellent burger. It's open 24 hours a day, which is great when you've been up carousing all night long and just need some fast and cheap food (it's happened to me before).

This Week In Entertainment (11/24/08)

My Pick of the Week is familiar to my friends and me. It's a port of Chrono Trigger for the DS. I won't be picking it up unless I really want to see the new dungeon, but it's still a great game. It's the only game that really does a time travel theme right. (By the way, I would have loved it if they released this for the PS early, and not on that crappy Final Fantasy Chronicles set.)

On dvd this week is Hancock. I didn't see it so I may have to pick it up. Are you aware that Will Smith is pretty much the only movie star that can consistently draw people to theaters?

I don't watch 24, but wasn't this episode (movie?) on last night?

I think we should stop pushing Christmas so early, but we don't have to become totalitarians!

I'm not a fan of Comedy Central's mock news shows but here's Steven Colbert's Christmas dvd.

For those too lazy to wrap up a DVD case of Indiana Jones 4. Just remember to unwrap the outer wrappings or you'll really show everybody how lazy you are. (I need a thesaurus.)

Shouldn't this complete Pink Panther Collection come with insulation?

Something tells me that this 3D animated sequel to The Nutty Professor isn't very good. It could be the fact that it's buried deep in the amazon listings despite having Jerry Lewis in it.

I have on idea what this is about but I like the cover.


On the Wii we have a safecracking game. I'm going to give it the benefit of the doubt. This game could be either fun or poinless and I hope it's the former. I assume you rotate the Wii remote with your wrist.

Parodius Level 6

Wow! It's been a month or two, hasn't it? Let's hope I'm not too rusty!

At least I'm starting out in good shape. I've got a nice gun and I'm dropping lots of whales and I even have a bubble shield.

This level has a pinball theme. It's also damn difficult. It's especially hard to take screenshots with everything that's going on, but I'll try.

This picture was taken shortly after I 1, got the Engrish Megaphone of Awesome; and 2, picked up a blue powerup that cleared the enemies. That's why the screen looks so clear. Trust me, it got maddeningly full seconds later. Too full to screenshot, so that's why you get this boring pic.

See how naked and alone I look here? Yeah... I accidentally savestated myself while dying. I think a big effect of my not playing so long is I'm not as good at hitting the correct save/load keys as I used to be. I had to restart the level with no powerups. I was sad.

This part of the level looks innocent...

...But it isn't. All through this level these blue lights spawn and fly at you. They can be really hard to avoid, especially with so many on the screen at once.

I hate them.

This part was really rough, but a couple of blue Clear the Screen candies helped.

...not really much to say about the theme. It's just pinball. The drawings on the back wall are cute, I guess.


Guess who saved right here? Moments away from what appears to be the end of the level?

Oh well, I guess I'll just start again from the beginning of the lev--

asdfhaotyhahdkahghgf!!!!

Well, I just have to hit start to continue, so I guess I'll just hit start instead of--

Oh shit.


Well, here I am at the game over screen! I got first place, anyway, and I guess that's good...

Oh, who am I kidding? I suck at shooters!

This series will continue when I've worked my way back up to Level 6. Maybe by then I'll have remembered the difference between Save State and Load State. Not to mention, Select and Start. See you then!

Parodius Level 5

It's been a while, but I'm back with more Parodius!

Again we spend our time between levels floating through the void of space, dropping whales and shooting enemies. These enemies are different than the random winged creatures and hypodermic needles of past levels, though. These are flying winged Moai heads! You know, the Easter Island dudes?

This introduces this level's theme.

Instead of a traditional level, this time we fight a giant Moai-themed ship! I'm giant, too. You might have noticed that bell in the previous pic. I caught it on green and a green bell is pretty much a Win Game button. It makes you all huge and even though you can't shoot, anything you run into you kill. It's not the most entertaining bell effect in the game, but it's the most useful.

The ship, as you can see, is called Captain Kebab. He shoots rings and bullets out of his nose and mouth, but if you avoid them long enough he'll start to float down and let you fly over the top of him. Usually there are more Moai heads planted on Kebab's back to shoot at you, but I killed them with my huge penguin powers.

Get far enough and you hit this big gold Moai head that, believe it or not, shoots at you. I think it's possible to kill him, though I didn't manage it this time. If you can, it takes a lot of shots.

Right when you think you're nearly done, though, Captain Kebab backs up!

Now you're back at the front and this time the Captain wants to fly over your head!

I like this picture of Kebab, by the way. Look at that smooth bastard right there.

I managed to kill some of the baddies on the underneath of the ship waaaay while I was still embiggened, but these two were unreachable. They're hard to reach now, too, because they're in their little nook there. It would be a bad idea to let them live, though. Kill them!

This is why. Captain Kebab takes it into his head to smoosh you. He sinks down lower than this screenshot shows and the only place you can be is in the tiny little niche where those two green Moai were before you blew them up.

Eventually he lets up and you can move on some more. You can shoot this dude in the back of the head for a while, but it won't do you any good.

Eventually Captain Kebab gives up and you're free to move on!

This looks like one of those space areas between levels, but don't be fooled.

Here comes the level boss and I got my megaphone just in time!

I WILL SUE THIS ESTABRISHMENT.

Very ladylike. That's... not suggestive at all.

So this boss shoots these gigantic Moai statues at you. You can't kill them; you just have to dodge. When you get a chance, shoot the lady Moai in the eye.

It doesn't take too long, but those Moai men can be tough to doge. I almost stavestated myself into oblivion during this boss fight and that would have been really sad. I like my powerups!


Beat her, though, and you get to see the rest of the Moai planet. That's the end of this level. See you next time!

And special thanks to Tork...

I have a youtube account. While I don't plug it here, I am going to plug a youtube video that just special thanked me. I think. If not, I like to think they were thanking me.

Anyway, two years ago after getting broadband I was putting up some videos at my brand new account. It was mostly Nuveena and video game stuff. Than I got a bright idea. What if I play through EarthBound and put up ten minute videos of the entire game? For those who don't know, EarthBound is a trippy Super NES rpg that was a huge hit in Japan, a bomb in America, but now has a cult following here. You play as a modern young teen who has to stop an alien invasion by traveling through silly caricatures of America and other parts of the world to collect a song.

Anyway the youtube thing was already getting a lot of press and I suddenly thought it would be fun if I could flood youtube with a bunch of videos of a an entire playthrough of a game I loved. Since I've played the game several times before, I tried to hit as many locations and conversations as possible. It took me 117 videos, all under 10 minutes to complete the game. The final count was about 14 and a half hours, not including the several mistakes I made. (I didn't use Windows Movie Maker at the time, so I had to trust that my emulator would make a movie file that was under the 100 Mb max and that I would quit before the 10 minute mark.)

Why am I bringing this up? Because before me, there were only about two EarthBound videos. As the first one who put up full EB videos and who actually beat the game, I got several subscriptions. There have since been other playthroughs, and they're probably better than mine, but I get to claim to be the first.

Which leads up to this video. This video is a fan project by a group call UbseyMovie that make purposely low budget videos based on the EarthBound story. This video is chapter four.




Wait till the credits. I'm sure they're thanking me and I'm flattered if it is. They may have used my videos to find some key dialogue. If not, it's still a fun video. If you never heard of the game, at least go to about 3 quarters in and watch the band play.

Parodius: Level 4

Between levels again. It's just me and my little pink penguin buddy flying through space together.


Ah. Time for the traditional beginning of the level round of heads and chickens and hypodermic needles and stuff.


This time we get somebody new, the freaky naked pig Cupid thing! If you don't kill him quick he circles around behind you to shoot you more and you'll probably see his buttcheeks.


The actual level is fashioned like feudal Japan, what with the cherry trees and huts and sumo wrestlers and penguins and things.

The music is... Ever seen a variety show act with a dude who was like spinning plates on sticks and stuff? It's the music they probably played with that. The plate spinning music. It fits here. (All the music fits in these games.)


There are volcanoes and they hang from the clouds. Do not fly into them.

Even when they pair up on you.

There is a sharp spike in difficulty starting right about here.

Trees! And bees! Witness the first of about a million deaths on this level. I didn't snapshot every one, for your convenience. See how that bottom tree's roots look different than the upside-down trees roots? It's because it's uprooted itself and is running along the bottom of the screen. Stupid jerky cherry tree!


Oh, good. Things are starting to mellow out a little. Surely this is a good sign for the rest of the level.


Arrrrgh!!! Angry volcanoes! And eggplants!!!
Just be calm... Avoid the volcanoes... continue dropping little pink whales on the floor...

AAAARRRGHHH!!! More eggplants!!!


And even more eggplants!!!!! (I didn't die here. I don't know how that happened.)


Finally that's over. I've never liked eggplant.


Meet the boss!


Uh... hi, Boss.


I didn't get a shot of it because I was attempting not to die, but when he stomps the ground a bunch of random garbage falls on you from above. It's not a big deal to dodge. Just shoot him a lot.


Oh, yeah, Boss, you know you like it.

Level 4 ends here, lamely, as do I.

Parodius: Level 3

You're just in time for more of this!

Like all levels, we start IIIINNNN SPAAAAACE!!!


But eventually we get to this cool-looking castle kind of place. Cue the Tchaikovsky!


Ooo!!! This level is made of cake! It must be SOMEBODY'S BIRTHDAY!!!



Erm.... This is about to hurt. Load state!!


Ah. Here's the gimmick of the level. There's all this candy piled up and we have to shoot our way through it. It's kind of difficult.

Even though you only need a two-candy-wide path to go through, it pays to try to keep your path wider so you don't get penned in somewhere. Watch out for the jack-o-lanterns as they run by all "NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM."


We're through the big candy wall, but just because we're back to the cake doesn't mean we're done with candy.

The cake castle becomes a maze with the occasional candy pile to block you.

Oh yay! I got the megaphone! Save state!

Wait... maybe that was a bad...


Urrrrgh!!!!! The Engrish does not go through candy!

Ok, played through that whole section again and now we're out of the cake and the candy and on to... this weird temple looking place.

Here comes the boss!

Who more appropriate in a level made of Tork's birthday cake than all the munching mouths of the people who want to eat it?

They shoot teeth at you and it's annoying.


For some reason the music for this boss battle is that Can Can dance. It's weird, but oddly, it fits.

Eventually victory is mine and we zoom back into space!