Ok, the last time I made a post where I said something like "They're back!" and it was MST3k-related, I got horribly burned. I guess I haven't learned my lesson, because I'm excited about the upcoming sequel to Hobgoblins. Unfortunately, my MST3k friends don't share my enthusiasm. Spoil-sports.
The original Hobgoblins was an 80s movie that was like a cross between Gremlins and Saved By The Bell. It was an intentionally stupid furry critter rip-off that was also sleazy. When MST3k got the movie from director Rick Sloane, they were appalled by it and ripped it like they never ripped on any movie before. Rick Sloane said he enjoyed the episode until the closing credits when the bots pulled out a cardboard cutout and pretended that the director was giving an interview. Of course, thanks to MST3k the movie is now (in)famous enough to get a sequel greenlighted. So that's what takes us to the sequel.
The trailer can be found here at youtube. From what I've read, the movie takes place twenty years in the future, but it doesn't look like much has changed. The cast (completely different from the old cast) is now going to college. So I guess they waited until their late 30s to go. I guess our hero's security career finally paid off. Anyway, Mr. McCreedy was sent to a insane asylum after he blew up the last hobgoblins in the first movie...OR SO HE THOUGHT!
The wiki page suggests that it's more of a remake then a sequel, which makes sense. I'm sure the movie will keep the characters the same age (except McCreedy. They wanted the same actor for him but health problems prevented that from happening.) Only stuff like technology will change, because now Kyle is looking up Fantazia on porno webcams. At least, I think it's suppose to be XXX. The trailer is a bit confusing on that part. I wouldn't be surprised if all the characters were reset. They weren't much in the first place, and I can't see Rick doing anything with, for example, Amy, who was frigid at the beginning of the first movie and not frigid at the end. I mean, where do you go with her after that!? Obviously, you re-frigidize her.
So yeah, this movie will be more of the same of the first movie, only it'll probably have more stupid self-aware bad-attempts-at-camp humor. Maybe my friends were on to something? Naaah.
I don't remember any special effects in the first movie, but I can say that they look worse in this one. I would love to take a bunch of old monitors and start hitting them with golf clubs until one of them exploded into a cheap fireball. Is this special effect so important that they blew the budget on it? It would explain the lack of lighting in the entire trailer. According to the rules of the first movie, the Hobgoblins shouldn't even attack because it's so dark.
A quick look at the characters: The guy they got to play Kevin2 is not whiny enough. He's got to work on that. Nick2 doesn't strike me as mean and macho as the original, but I'm looking forward to him fighting the Hobgoblin with a chainsaw. I do wish Rick didn't give him the dumb line about "it's only a low budget movie." Come on, Rick. If I hate the characters, I should hate them on their own (de)merits. Not because you made it impossible to like them. I was never a fan of the Scream movies.
Daphne2 seems just about right. I hate to be mean to Kelley Palmer who had to be the slutty girlfriend stereotype, but new Daphne is just skinny and not-so-attractive enough to be just right as a look-a-like. Daphne2 kind of sounded like Daphne with her one line. I'd like to see her in action, not because of the slut stuff but because in the end, Daphne was a better hero than Kevin.
Amy2 and Kyle2 don't appear much in the trailer, but they don't need to. Kyle2 should comb his hair, but other than that I guess it doesn't matter as long as he wears the red shorts. Chanel Ryan is way too attractive for a sleazy character like Fantazia, but maybe they made her less attractive in the movie as a joke. I wouldn't be surprised if Rick Sloane did something like that.
There's a little girl in the movie who I thought was going to be more important because there's a picture of her holding a Hobgoblin somewhere online, but I think she's just a joke character. She plays a girl scout.
You know what this movie needs? A rich black girl. I'm just saying.
Who cares about characters? This is a Hobgoblins film! What we care about is action! Ok, we also care about how Rick is going to react to the fame of the original. Unfortunately, he's probably going to go crazy with in-jokes as the "low budget movie" joke shows. But on the plus side, he's going to give us garden tool ACTION! Don't forget the chainsaw vs lawnmower ACTION! Totally worth my 20 dollars or less. Also, Nick2's van gets rolled over. SHOCKING!
The thing that will catch the attentions of MSTies is the fact that the trailer stole the Hobgoblin song. Ha! Take that! I've seen fans get angry but I think it was the only injoke that was funny. Sure, it's probably a sign that the movie is too self-aware, but why wouldn't Rick Sloane steal something from the episode that made him famous? Do MSTies just expect him to bend over and ask for more? Jeez, lighten up. The fact that a nobody can make a sequel to a terrible movie because it appeared on your show speaks volumes of the popularity of MST3k.
I've grown incoherent. It's because this movie is going to be so awesome! Or so awful it's awesome! Or it'll eventually become a Rifftrax and/or a Cinematic Titanic! Or maybe I'm crazy.
I leave you with this picture to boost my traffic, at least until someone forces me to take it down.
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