Like my nightmare situation, I get hit by a speeding vehicle.* Instead of dying, I'm just unconscious for a couple weeks. When I wake up, I find that the Redskins are heading to Green Bay, and someone has a copy of Dallas's humiliating defeat on DVD for me.
Washington reaches Superbowl 42, and face off against the Patriots. It's the battle of two franchises whose Superbowl record is 3-2! Belichick vs Gibbs seems like a great match, until the game starts.
Campbell gets the start after recovering from his injury and completes almost every pass he throws. The occasional incompletion happens whenever he chucks a football at a reporter that compares him to Doug Williams because Jason is "teh black." Brian Mitchell unretires and returns four kick returns for touch downs. This allows him to pad his stats so Devin Hester won't break his record for probably another year.
Sean Taylor leads the defense by becoming a zombie. Hey, why not? If he's going to be mentioned every few seconds by every media-type, why not actually play?
The game MVP is unretired Art Monk, who has the greatest game ever just to prove how stupid the Hall of Fame selection committee is.
Joe Gibbs retires because the job was sucking the life out of him. Later in the year he becomes a third party candidate for president due to write-in votes by Skins fans. This nonsense somehow leads to a good candidate winning the presidency. Don't ask me who or how. I think I'm letting my topic get away from me.
Bill Simmons is so devastated that he stops pretending that anybody cares about the NBA.
*- or the Redskins win tomorrow, thus setting up a week of agonizing about the Dallas game. This scenario will not be good for my heart.
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1 comment:
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