And now... Parodius!

My attempt to play Superman earlier today failed miserably and I'm sure you're all really disappoined about that. But you know what? I know what can make it all better.

Why, yes. That is a picture of an octopus with panties on his head.

I love the Parodius series. When Tork asked me if there were any kinds of games to avoid before this all started, I told him I'm not a fan of shooters, so don't give me a shooter game unless there's something that makes it special. I would definitely count Parodius as a shooter with something special. As of right now, these games are the only games in the shooter genre I can stand.

Parodius is a parody of the Gradius series. If you play Gradius, there's all kinds of in-jokes and references that will make you giggle. I don't care about that, though. I never played Gradius. I hate shooters. So I don't get most of the in-jokes. The game still makes me giggle, though, because it's so damn funny.

Though tempted to play as the octopus, I prefer to play as the penguin for this game because he has better power ups. I suck at shooters and I need all the help I can get. (Yay for savestate abuse!)


You start every level by flying through space and these head things fly at you. Shoot a set of them and you get candy. Get enough candy and you can upgrade your weapons. Eventually you will fly to land and get to see what the theme of the level is.

Bells are good to get because they give you cool status effects. Shoot them until they turn a color you like. I forget what the blue one did for me. Nothing that thrilled me.


I do like the bell that turns you huge and invincible. The theme for this level is pirates!


The first miniboss of the game! It's a pirate ship kitten thing! You must shoot it until it dies. Note that when you shoot it, it makes adorable kitten mewing noises. I love Japan.


Kitty!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

And this is the first boss of the game. Gradius fans like to wink and elbow each other while saying nonsense like "shoot the core!" This is a reference to how you have to kill bosses in Gradius. This concept carries over to Parodius, too. In this case, the "core" is the pink penguin's belly button.
He does not like to be shot there. Would you?


The green penguins are his shield. It didn't save him, though. He is beaten! (See the tear falling out of his eye?) He falls into the sea and you fly back into space. So ends Level 1.

Level 1 barely scratches the surface of the insanity to come. This game is crazy hard, but a lot of fun.