Music Video #85 (Day 25 of 2009)

Yesterday's video is O Valencia! It's done by The Decemberists and comes in two flavors. We'll take a look at the cut version first.




We start in a closed diner. Decemberists lead singer Colin Meloy is telling some guy that he and his girlfriend Francesca are running away. Left out is the reason; probably something to do with his grabby fans harassing him. The other guy has a secret service look to him. Colin asks for a safe house and some passports. Other guy grants it, but warns that there is a price. Colin is to hang out at the hotel Valencia and wait for everything.

Colin drives in his truck to the Valencia Hotel. The music video gets it's name from the fact that "Office" in "Office of Valencia Hotel" has all but it's first letter burnt out. The song starts. The lyrics tell us we're dealing with a Romeo and Juliet story. You know, two dummies fall for each other and end up getting hit by the crossfire of their rival families, gangs, or whatever. This song plays it close to Romeo and Juliet, with references to rival families and throwing rocks against a window. Still, it's updated for the modern audiences with references to a car. Would a car solved things in the original play? I never read it so I don't know.

Our couple hides out in a hotel room. A helpful caption tell us which one is Francesca. Actually, we're also told that she's the daughter of the boss. Uh oh! They stand around and look tense, until Colin tries to give Francesca a hug. She responds by going down off camera. I don't think they were trying to imply anything here. Colin walks up to the wall and puts his ear against it. Usually I would check behind the curtains. He does this because he knows that there are people spying on him. Like everyone. The ease droppers are identified as some fake band who are really the best at spying. I knew it! I'm going to end this paragraph without revealing what I knew.

Colin and his gal are now relaxed and circling want ads. Meanwhile the song tells us that Colin swore that he would not compromise on his goal to touch the boss's daughter. No better motivation, really. Unfortunately for them, they were ratted out by her sister. Pfft, I bet it was her younger sister. You just can't trust younger sisters.

Soon we see the piano wire gals of Burnside. Who are they? What, have you been living under a rock? They knock on another adjacent room. They enter and soon garrote somebody for killing their parents. Not that that has anything to do with out story. I guess they wanted to toss in some more secret spy stuff. Don't worry about our couple. Colin is once again repeating the bit about how he'll toss rocks at Francesca's window before they drive off into the sunset.

We see more spy people. This group pretends to work on chimney's but they actually dispose of bodies. IS EVERYBODY CONNECTED LIKE THIS? Maybe it's suppose to make the ending of this video (spoiler alert) more tragic. "It's us against the world, baby!" Literally.

As I wonder why everybody is working against me, we learn that in the song, Valencia is the girlfriend, who got herself shot by dear old dad. Doh! Ok, so the song doesn't say it's him, but dad's are always overly protective in stories. It could be a brother, but I'm sure the dad is considered the bad guy regardless. Singer swears to burn the whole city down because of one family.

Colin looks outside and sees all "They" of the world walking up to his motel room. Francesca is blissfully listening to music. Then after a couple cuts she's aware and Colin is about to cowboy up. He even takes a classic gunslinger pose as he clutches his hand near his side. This isn't going to accomplish anything but I guess a man has to do... Suddenly, fighting! Yay, they remember that guys watch love stories too! Colin beats the first two people up buy the rest figure out that they can all attack at once, defeating Colin. They drag him around and he looks a little roughed up. Peanut-headed guy from the video intro shows up. This doesn't help as he is on Francesca's father side.

I'm confused by what happens next. Somehow, the daughter ends up dead. She doesn't rushes in front of a bullet meant for Colin, so what happened? We see fat head loading a gun, and some people crowd around Francesca, but it doesn't make sense that they assassinated her instead of Colin. "I'll kill my own daughter to get back at her no good boyfriend! That'll learn him!"

Maybe the city should be burned to the ground. Bunch of weirdos.




Ok, so the answers are in the uncut version. The uncut version has credits at the beginning and a letter at the end. Colin reads it and we hear a voice over. Colin's character was named Patrick, but I'm not going back to change that. Anyway, poor Colin was a dope who she never cared for. She just stole a lot of money from her crooked dad and used Colin to attempt to get away from all the inevitable goons. She tells him that she knew that he cared for her, but it's time for him to get over it. Ouch. Sniff. What? It's nothing.

Two months later he's talking to the goon who betrayed him. Goon has an eyepatch due to something Colin did, I think. Goon tells him that Colin is alive because of him, and that it was goon's one chance of taken over the town. Colin is stonefaced until he holds up a vile of poison. Oops, goon starts coughing heavily. However, he has a Reverse Card from Uno. With his dying breath, he slashes Colin's throat. And then they all go to hell. The end.





Man, that director's cut filled in some hole's but ended everything on a downer. You know, more down than the original downer.

This is a good song even if I don't care for tragic romances. The video is Ok even though it makes me want to look out the window.

The awesome part is kung fu Colin.